Heroin Support Blog

Dear Heroin, You took my mom.

Not only did you take her you stole her, but you also stole her love for our family and me, you stole her health and care, you stole the one person I was meant to trust. I know my mother didn't start with you, she's ending with you and she isn't dead yet, but she isn't alive either. Heroin, you have destroyed me, and I'm not even a user. You've made my mother abandon me, made her steal, break laws, lose jobs, ruin her health, you've made her unstable and reliant of you. My mother with her many mental disabilities fell victim to your hold, you embrace her and I wish she could let go. I used to wish all of the time that she could stop using and work really hard and become the mother I want and need.

But, every time she got sober or went to rehab you were there to pick her up when she exited their doors. I know my mother, like millions of others, is not perfect and I pray for her and other people I see on drugs every day. I wish and pray to God that someday she will finally be released and will fully be okay again. I pray every day for her safety. Heroin you aren't the only problem here, there are millions of people that enable your use and even more people that do other drugs too. I wish opium was not abused. I wish drug use and abuse was not real. I wish I could have the woman back that raised me, but I know everything happens for a reason. I know that God has a plan for everything.

But I am sick and tired of sitting back and seeing the drug dealers be set free from prison, the manufacturers and users getting slaps on the wrist. I hope it doesn't happen but I wouldn't be surprised if my mom overdosed and died from heroin. She's overdosed before and has been lucky enough to live. My mom has 5 kids and lost her parental rights to all of her kids over a decade ago. I wish I could wipe the slate clean of heroin, but then again as I've stated before everything happens for a reason. Heroin, I hope you get the justice you deserve.

Sincerely, A pissed off member of society that is suffering under your wrath

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#AskMeAboutMyAngel #HeroinMemorial #GoneToSoon

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Dear Heroin: You Took My World

I hate you, you took everything from me. On April 21 st at 1034am you took away my angel. We had so much ahead of us, 3 beautiful babies, and one on the way. You were so happy and proud that we would be welcoming Gunner into our lives. My angel was trying so hard to stay on the right path, and be the righteous man. Now because of heroin our babies are without daddy. Heroin because of you i do not get to see that beautiful happy smile anymore, heroin because of you our son will never get to meet his dad, heroin because of you i feel so lost and empty and I’ve never even touched you, heroin because of you i can’t get out of bed because my heart aches for the person you took from me. He wasn’t prefect, but he was my everything. He was my happy place, he’s heart was my home. Heroin because of you i can never hear his voice again. He was trying so hard, why couldn’t your demons just leave him alone!? Why!? He had so much joy ahead of him! Heroin because of you i can’t even go into my house without picturing the love of my life laying their lifeless. Heroin because of you i know cry myself to sleep, instead of in the  arms of the one person who loved me for me. Heroin because of you my whole world is completely destroyed. Heroin, i hate you!

Heidi - Bethel, OH

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Dear Heroin: My Demons Couldn't Drown Me

You destroyed my life.  I used to be a good kid. I never got trouble. I stood up for what was mine.  Don't get me wrong.  I had a house, I took care of other people's kids, I had a car.  I had it all going on until I snorted my 1st slide of heroin.  After that my life went downhill.  I went from snorting it  to smoking it to finally injecting it.  After I started injecting it my life took a complete 360.  I lost my cars and my house.  Then it took me down to the worst part of the neighborhood.  I had moved a couple places down there and was evicted from everywhere.  Me and my boyfriend were then homeless.  We would go to his dad's house to shower and pretty much get ready to go back.  It was horriable the things you have to do to stay alive.  I did some horrible things for which I am not proud of. 

We had to stay alive and we had to make sure we had money and heroin so we weren't sick.   You know when you're out there in the city that's filled with nothing but dope dealers, drug addicts and prostitution it's crazy and unfortunately that was exactly how my life was.  I used to be 180 lb and I went all the way down to 98 lb.   I walked so much that I literally walked right out of my shoes.   It ruined my life and ruined everything I ever had going for me.  After a few years of living that lifestyle in and out of jail all the time I went from not having a record to now having a bad record that I'm not proud of.  I woke up one day and I couldn't take no more.   I wanted to go to rehab and I wanted to go right now.  I told my boyfriend that he had to either go with me or I was going to have to leave him.  He chose to go with me and get help as well.

Unfortunately I was able to get into a treatment facility and he was not.  As time went on I finally had got discharged from detox and my mother let me come stay with her.   I was so happy but I was so sad at the same time because I couldn't be around my boyfriend because he was still using and I could not be around it so eventually I talked to him and I found out that he got into a treatment facility so that he could be with me.  I did great as time goes on we both experienced a lot of health issues and damaged our body so bad he ended up with stage 3 cirrhosis hepatitis C and I ended up with the same thing.  I just wasn't as bad after 2 years of being clean that is when my boyfriend found out he had stage 3 and he was very ill he could barely get out of bed sometimes.  It was hard but he relapsed and then he tried to get it together again and then he relapsed again and again unfortunately the last relapse was the end.  He overdosed while I was babysitting at my mom all night and his mother found him in our room.  It was the most devastating thing I think I ever been through my whole entire life.  He was my world.  We were together for 8 years today and I am three years clean.  He passed away on the 7th and it will be 5 months in May.  I'm still grieving and I still feel like I want to use sometimes now.  When I think about all the things that I had went through it makes me not want to go back because it killed somebody that I was very close to.  Somebody that loved me very much in and that had see me at my worst.   

His mother is my world as well and we will always have each other but I will say this is not something that you use recreational. It is not a game people need to start waking up and realizing that everybody's dying.  I don't have anybody left as everybody is now passed away except for two people but they're in prison for a very long time. I work really hard to stay clean and I do everything that I possibly can to make sure that I do not ever go back to it.  If you're reading this please get help.  It is available you just have to take one day at a time did not let the devil get the best of you.  There is a God.

Jennifer - Franklin County, Ohio

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That Devil Drug

Dear Heroin
You took my mom from me.
You took her womanhood, her children, and what she was supposed to be.
My mother had such a bright start.

But then you ripped away at her heart.
Many nights were so cold and lonely.
On the streets of Cincinnati.
I learned at 12,

Just how my mom shot up.
I thought it was a quick way,
To get her back on track.
I miss my mom so much.

I wish I could have her back.
I'm only 17 years old.
Now, what do you think about that?

Brianna Hartke

Click Here to Submit your Dear Heroin Story Here

#AskMeAboutMyAngel #HeroinMemorial #GoneToSoon

www.HeroinMemorial.org   www.HeroinSupport.org 

Click here to donate to our cause

Click here to submit your own memorial tribute.

Click here to shop our fundraising wristbands.

Dear Heroin

You have ruined the last 3 years of my life. Actually, who are we kidding. You know everything so let's be honest. You made my life passively fun the first year or so in your lesser form. You gave me an escape from the stress, the pain, the boredom. When it 'felt' like I was caving in from everything you made it bearable, fun, warm and comfortable. What you didn't tell me was this reprieve would come at a cost. The highest cost I would ever have to pay, and I would have to pay it back with interest for all the time that passed each day. If you had told me then what I know now, I would have stayed as far away from you as I knew how. I would of picked myself up any other way. I would of made myself heal with hard work and sincere effort. Or I could of done nothing. I would of been better off the way I was when you got a hold of me then I am now. I would of viewed you as you are. As the plague. As something evil. As nothing more than lies wrapped in a pretty package and handed to me by someone I should of been able to trust. Someone that should have wanted the best for me but brought me death through you instead.

The last 2 years you have shown what you really are. How much you take for what you give. How truly robbed I have allowed myself to become because of you and you will not stop until you can take everything from me or I can find the strength to throw you away first. You've had my mind and my body but you crave my soul. My eyes are wide open now. You are an ugly thing. You take something broken and make sure it's thrown away instead of fixed. You have kept me chained to a life I don't belong in. To a situation I would have left years ago. You have truly taken me and tried to break me in every way. You have tried to keep me just below the surface of the water, gasping, struggling for my life, swallowing water. It's time for me to grab the strength I have left and fight. Fight for the sun, the air, dry land. I have worked too hard to keep you from drowning me completely. It's time to say goodbye to everything I knew and find myself again without you.

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Dear Heroin: I Lost My 24 Year Old Nephew

I just lost my only nephew, aged 24, to alleged heroin overdose.  I wish my friends never started using. It has torn me to shreds each and every day for the last 5 years.  I wake up every day afraid to check my phone to see if they have overdosed or died. I get a sense of relief when I find out they have been arrested and are in jail. Somewhere warm, detoxing (not in the best way), and having a meal or two. Not out on the streets, running at your every call. F#ck you heroin. You have ruined countless lives. I watch drug documentaries in disgust at the dealers. They arent just dealers anymore they are murderers. This has been going on for 5 years, I'm only 20.

Tracy - Gaithersburg, Maryland

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I just lost my only nephew, aged 24, to alleged heroin overdose. What does one do with this kind of tragic waste? It’s further destroyed our family and driven even more wedges in dysfunctional family relationships, at least for me.

This kid was offered and availed himself of every resource - psychiatric interventions for his diagnosed mental illness, regular counseling, hospitalization for mental health (six stays in under two years), in patient programs, out patient programs, sober living and jobs - low wage and dead end admittedly.

None of it helped.

The current “treatment” models don’t work. Beyond the complication of addiction, These people - addicts - do not have the life skills necessary to survive, compete and be productive citizens in society.

I believe that anyone tagged due to illegal drug use needs to be offered either jail time OR a mandatory 3-year minimum lock down - with housing, Social and life skills, job and career training and a life plan put into place being provided. Two, three and 6-Week programs do little to nothing.

I personally feel that drug dealers who are caught and prosecuted for causing death should be jailed and then executed.